Small Death... in the 12th House

The never ending parental polishing of life, over my raw diamond heart.  Losing your stepping in the rat race is always a moment of anxiety, self punishment, and paraplegic grace.  Looking into the past how I should have done things better.  Imagining into the future detrimental outcomes completely out of my control.  Losing control of my mind and thus,  my internal world loses connection with the present moment. I have just created hell in me, the perfect breeding grounds for the false self to attack my innocence.  This feeling is experienced by everyone in the world.  The feeling of not being able to provided for your family, when the boyfriend has left, when she never call back, when your alone, when you have lost your safety.  This feeling does not choose between classes, races, or ideologies.  The pressure to be a slave of this money making machine we call society, will always attack the instinctual feeling of safety that lies deep inside our human flesh.  The fear is so embedded in our realities that we have learn that money is our own means for safety.  Thats why people marry for money and  why people kill others for money.  In the end everyone just wants safety and are willing to give everything up for it.  This unspoken illusion is so decremental to out evolution as a species that we find ourselves in the hell that we call "world."  The massive poverty and violence is a reflection of the ones in power that will never compromise their safety for no one, no matter if they are they leader of a nation, 

Valentina IsisComment